Saturday, July 19, 2008

Rumblestrip Venkity…....for Kauser

C.S.Venkiteswaran is a friend who writes his column Rumblestrip every Thursday for the City Express in Cochin. I am a privileged reader in that I get a preview whenever he remembers to send me his piece for the week a prior to it being published. He constantly urges me to write and I love reading his columns. The following is a chat we had one afternoon in late 2006. He has been nagging me for quite a while to put my thoughts of Kauser on paper. One fine day I shared this chat with my film-maker sister Shubashini and she suggested that I enter this chat into my blog as is. I do as she suggested and I hope you understand the connection I have with Kauser…………

Chat begins:

2:59 PM me: Hi

How are you

venkity: fine

me: I am Ahmedabad now

venkity: on nation-trot again?

3:00 PM me: Hahahhhahhaha

venkity: on business?

me: Do you know Kauser Banu

Yes on work

venkity: no

3:01 PM how r things?


9 minutes

3:11 PM me: Sorry was on the phone

Ok about Kauser Banu......

neither do I know her

3:12 PM But we have something in common

Both of us conceived our first child around the same time

3:13 PM Only I did so in peaceful Cochin and she was in Ahmedabad and during the riots was raped and "dewombed" and left to die

Her foetus thrust onto a trident and taken round the streets

Am I traversing the very same streets now

I will never know

3:14 PM venkity: mm

me: But I am pregnant with my second child and

Am in Gujarat

Do I have a destiny for these things?

I will never know

venkity: (congrats anyway)

me: Kauser Banu I will never know her either

3:15 PM Thanks

Bye for now....got to go

venkity: there is a very touching aspect to what u said

me: Will be writing about this soon and will send it to you for editing

Oh tell me what

is it

3:16 PM venkity: the parallels i mean

me: Yes I know

I saw the picture of the foetus on the trident

3:17 PM Aarzoo was a foetus at the time and of the same age

venkity: phew

where?

me: You can imagine what it did to me

venkity: i can guess

3:18 PM me: There are times I look at my baby and can't help but think about the baby that was and of Kauser

Being here in a sense is quite traumatic

You should see the Hindu Rashtra sign boards

venkity: send me some pics

u have a digicam?

3:19 PM me: Nah....wish I could send you

3:20 PM Sorry about that

Will you take a look at the piece when I write about this and help me with it

3:21 PM venkity: sure, but pls do write it

me: Will do

venkity: it is something that should be written i feel

me: In fact I want a big favour from you

Can you save this chat and forward it to me as e-mail in order that I will be able to remember it

3:22 PM I was thinking about this and wrote to you impromptu

3:23 PM venkity: ok done

3:24 PM me: Thanks and I promise to write it as soon as I can

venkity: i think it gets automatically saved if it is not off the record

3:25 PM me: Ok ....but I want you to save it nevertheless as a file and then copy paste it and send it to me as an e-mail

venkity: ok

me: One can never be sure of these things

Ok then

3:26 PM venkity: take care

bye

me: Bye for now and thank you for agreeing to help

venkity: anytime, mam

End of Chat

I often think of her and her unborn baby. Aarzoo is a constant reminder and Tamanna to an extent. How old was Kauser when she conceived and when she was killed? What were her dreams? Did she think of her future and that of the life within? Was hers an arranged marriage? Did she love her husband or had she made compromises? Was she a working woman? Did she live in Ahmedabad all her life or did she come there after she was married? Did she plan to go to her mother’s for her confinement? Would our paths have crossed, ever?......Millions of questions for a woman I will never know……….A woman I would not have heard of and we each would have lived our own lives and played out our destiny. May be this is it…….this is the way it was meant to be. She going away and I overwhelmed by the connection, writing these pieces as a tribute to a fellow human being, a woman I will never know. Adieu Kauser, may you rest in peace, may your baby forgive this cruel world. May I be a good person and a good mom and bring up my daughters as good human beings, a fitting tribute to your “ajanmi bitiya”

Thank you, Venkity, for the constant encouragement to write about this. It helped as you said it would.

7 comments:

KitchenKarma said...

muthu, these last 3 pieces of urs are worth the whole lot of junk i write and lots more...

Muthu said...

Dear dear Suchi, that was such a lovely compliment from you. While I may say thanks as courtesy, I do not agree about your writing being junk. Each of us has a story and we share it......period. It's just that this story which is really Kauser's story touched a raw nerve because of your own experiences at the IPT.......like I said I am a big fan o your writing and will brook no criticism.....love you

Paresh Palicha said...

Glad to find my Muthu Teacher here. Fabulous Writer,Speaker, Fighter, Mother & what not... Welcome!

Thank you for that sweet birthday wish

subha said...

These 3 pieces narrate a fierce cruelty and the friction between the nation's different ethnic groups. Political events, are only a part of this story.The internal struggle is the underlying theme, awakening curiosity about the world around us, speaking truth as the lessons of history echo down the years.The fragility of the relationship between the writer and Kauser banu, symbolized by foetus, turns out to be the thread that ties them together. With inordinate compassion and stunning simplicity, akkaiya portrays Kauser banu and her unborn’s impossible dilemma. Complications abound, but the answer lies in humanity's capacity for kindness. The grace of acceptance heals the wounds of brutality, for with forgiveness anything is possible, even the wild joy of soaring kites against a winter sky.

Muthu said...

Wow.....Paresh...thanks a ton for the wonderful compliments. I do not make regular entries but hope you come back and read once in a while

Muthu said...

Well Shuba....what can I say....just cannot beat your way with words. Thanks a ton. Means a lot to me

Unknown said...

A public happening felt (not seen) in the light of a pesonal experience. And all these comments endorsing the fact that there are so many of us around who can still 'feel' when something happens that makes the world less better to live in.

I remember my visits to Gujarat first in 1988 and then again in 1993. I was awestruck by the progress that this state had made on several fronts.

I found it hard to believe that the same Gujarat was going through this calamity

What goes through the minds of the perpetrators of such hatred! I wonder! Amidst all the progress that we see around us ..is there something missing..!!!

Reminds me of the following verses I came across so long ago that I don't know who penned them.

First dentistry was painless,
then bicycles were chain-less,
and carriages were horseless
and many laws enforce-less.
Next cookery wise fireless,
telegraphy was wireless,
cigars were nicotine-less
and coffee caffeine-less.
Soon oranges were seedless,
the putting green was weedless,
the college boy was hat-less,
the proper diet fat-less.
New motor roads are dustless,
the latest steel is rust-less,
our tennis courts are sodless,
our new religion Godless.