Erma Bombeck

Erma Louise Bombeck – Rest in Peace. I am a huge fan. Do not possess the same felicity and verve with words that you did, but this is my tribute to you.

She had me well and truly hooked, booked and cooked from the time I read her book – “Motherhood – the World’s Second Oldest Profession”. Arguments about the veracity of the title abound; considering that one could easily claim Motherhood as being almost as old as life itself. But hey, also considering that the title of the Oldest Profession had already been taken or rather thrust upon a certain group, we would not want to get into silly little technicalities now, would we?

Anyway, I have been a huge fan of her writing. I confess that for a short fuse like me, it has been her writing that has kept me from bursting arteries and veins and what have you in my role as “Mommy”!! I have been able to maintain a sense of humour in some of the most trying situations with the kids, thanks to those words she cared to pen down. There has been many a moment that hairbrush did not connect to bottoms, when it should have and my brood may want to confer sainthood on her. They owe it to her that I was able to see “funny side up”.

“At Wit’s End” is a book of hers that I am keen to read. The irony is that I have it in my personal collection but have never been able to lay my hands on it simply because it is constantly in circulation!! And yours truly has been stupidly generous enough; not just with urging people to read but giving them the copy as well!

A few years ago, this piece was forwarded to me by a friend. I had not deleted the mail and chanced upon it recently. I realized that I just had to share it. I could not give better advice to my children or to those that I love or to the world at large. As for me, I am trying hard to follow the lessons Erma learnt instead of reinventing the wheel.


IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck
(Written after she found out she was dying from cancer.)

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the
earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it
melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was
stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and
worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the
fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble
about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my
husband.

I would have sat on the lawn with my children and not worried about
grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and
more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical,
wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have
cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me
was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, Later,
now go get washed up for dinner."

There would have been more "I love you's." More "I'm sorry's."

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every
minute...look at it and really see it ... live it... and never give it
back.

Stop sweating the small stuff.

Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what.
Instead, let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Let's think about what God HAS blessed us with.
And what we are doing each day to promote ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally, as well as spiritually.

Life is too short to let it pass you by.
We only have one shot at this and then it's gone.

I hope you all have a blessed day.